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Mr. Tito's PHAT WWE Tables, Ladders, and Chairs (TLC) Pay Per View Review with Match Ratings & Show Grade
By Mr. Tito
Dec 13, 2015 - 10:59:20 PM

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Welcome back to the EXCELLENCE IN COLUMN WRITING here by yours truly, Mr. Tito, that is exclusively here at / INSTA-COLUMN time for tonight's Tables, Ladders, and Chairs Pay Per View event by the WWE. In case you haven't read my recent reviews, I prepare my column as the event is ongoing and instantly post the column as a completed product when the show is over. That way, you can simply log onto at / to read an instant opinion on the show. I'd like to say that I have people skills...

Heading into this show, my expectations were LOW... No Seth Rollins, no John Cena, or no Brock Lesnar... Easily, those 3 wrestlers made for a compelling WWE year on Pay Per View. Without them, the highest part of the card suffered... I'm actually looking forward to the NXT Takeover event instead if that tells you anything.

Recently, I watched the movie Creed which is technically the 7th installment of the Rocky Balboa series. Great film, I strongly recommend it. Throughout the Rocky series, what makes the films great is how good they make the Boxing product look. Unlike in real boxing, Rocky and his opponents perform little to no defense. It's all clean headshots and most of the boxing matches are marathons with so many punches landed. Lots of blood, knockdowns, etc... No referees calling the match due to violence. How Rocky Balboa is able to even function after the 4th film is beyond me, but who cares, he lives to keep on fighting and in the movie Creed, teaching... Just like the rest of the films, the movie "Creed" features highly entertaining boxing matches. They are downright amazing with great cinematography and again, no defense.

Go watch a real boxing match... Nothing like that whatsoever! Many bought the Floyd Mayweather vs. Manny Pacquiao boxing match in which it seemed like few clean punches were actually landed. Mayweather is a very defensive fighter and Manny reportedly had a shoulder injury that kept him from being more aggressive (or so he says). Most people tuning in and paying $100 to watch that fight called it a major letdown including yours truly. It was one of the few big matches that Boxing still has yet to offer and yet it didn't give you anything flashy or compelling to watch. Casual fans got burned and chances are that they won't give boxing another shot.

What is my point? Like the Rocky films, the WWE is scripted... They have the tactical advantage of being able to make a form of fighting appear to be dramatic and unbelievable. And like the Rocky films furthermore, the WWE can do it every night if they choose. UFC or Pro Boxing doesn't have that luxury... It's real and all it takes is a mismatch or a bad moment for a match to end quickly... UFC fans paid $50-$60 to see a 13 second main event match last night at UFC 194. Sure, that includes the undercard, but you wouldn't have bought that UFC event if Jose Aldo vs. Conor McGregor wasn't on that show. Worse yet for UFC, within moments, legitimate Sports Media sites actually posted Vines on Twitter for the full 13 second fight. I know that many MMA fans have told me that that quick beating was well worth their money, but if that was me as a casual fan, I'd be disappointed for staying up so late to only see 13 seconds of action. No thanks.

Pay Per Views for the WWE should always be of HIGH QUALITY no matter what. They are scripted and can therefore manufacture drama to deliver for wrestling fans. If the WWE ever puts on a bad Pay Per View, it's on them for poor planning and execution.

Mr. Tito's PHAT WWE Tables, Ladders, and Chairs (TLC) Pay Per View Review

I did not watch the pre-game show... I'll catch that later or I won't. Busy coming home from a family gathering.

Opening match of the the show was New Day vs. Usos vs. Lucha Dragons... FINGER OF SHAME immediately to start the show as New Day, the champions, come out first. I guess it was because New Day did a promo beforehand, but champions coming out last should be a standard in pro wrestling. New Day are comical as ever and Big E/Kofi have come a long way as entertainers through this gimmick from whatever rubbed off from Xavier Woods. The Wheaties Box cover pose was amazing... Lucha Dragons came out second and Roman Reigns's cousins, the Usos, came out last. Great match to start the show... As I expected from my predictions, lots of high flying action... The spot where one of the Lucha Dragons and one of the Usos went through the ladder that was placed horizontally between another ladder and the ropes was just sick. That had to have hurt! Lucha Dragons were really game for this match and New Day played the heels perfectly to avoid danger and to cheat to win. Love the use of a trombone as a foreign object... [ **** ]

HOSS MATCH between Rusev vs. Ryback was up next. Lana is showing off the goods tonight with a tight black short skirt and a very tight white buttoned shirt. Not complaining... Interestingly enough, the crowd noise was pretty strong for this match and to both wrestlers' credit, they performed well together. On the outside, Rusev used Lana for a distraction (she flopped after getting bumped and Ryback showed concern). Rusev reverses Ryback's finisher into a kick and his Camel Clutch submission hold finishes Ryback. Good match as long as it serves to actually build up Rusev long-term. Kept short, but action packed in the short time given. [ **1/2 ]

More stupidity, as now Alberto Del Rio, the US Champion, comes out first and the challenger, Jack Swagger comes out second. Really? Jack Swagger merits coming out second? Remember when the WWE legitimately pushed this as a Wrestlemania match for the World Heavyweight Championship? Ugh... Oh, and this is a CHAIRS Match in which wrestlers cannot do headshots per WWE Policy. And to emphasize that this is a Chair Match, many folding chairs are placed on the outside in the sitting position. By the way, I've taken a few chairs to the head in my day... Not bad unless you get hit with the backside or any lip that sticks out. If you get hit with the flat part where your butt sits, it's actually a clean hit and didn't hurt that much... Jack Swagger did the ol' Sabu chair throw at Del Rio's head... I'm sure someone backstage is fuming... Crowd seems indifferent with the exception of when Jack Swagger does his "WE THE PEOPLE" thing. Swagger tried a Superplex onto chairs but was reversed into an arm bar submission hold over the ropes... Apparently, that is legal in a Chairs match... Well, wouldn't Ladders and Chairs be also allowed then? Poor Jack was stuck in the corner and after getting beatdown by Del Rio with chairs, Alberto Del Rio was able to easily get the win with one last stomp (which I'm sure NXT fans will dislike for sort of using Finn Balor's finisher). Not bad, but the psychology of this match gimmick made the match confusing. [ **1/2 ]

More confusing psychology from production... Wyatt Family has their own combined entrance while Rhyno, Tommy Dreamer, and Dudley Boyz arrive out separately each. OK... Michael Cole brags up their "85 combined years of experience" which isn't exactly a compliment considering the type of matches that all 4 guys have wrestled. Tommy Dreamer throws in trash cans and kendo sticks... So, what's up? Swagger and Del Rio could only use chairs in a Chairs Match but ECW/Wyatts can use more than tables in a Tables Match? Funny moment when the table that Devon was on breaks as Erick Rowan jumps over him... Ooops. But he's still in. 3D to Rowan and he's the first eliminated. Holy cow, Luke Harper hit a Michinoku Driver! Rhyno fails to hit the spear on Wyatt, takes a big Harper boot to fall into the table. 3 on 3 now... Luke Harper takes a Doomsday Device by the Dudleys which always puts a smile on my face. Ohhhhhhh WHAT A RUSH! I miss the Road Warriors so much... Devon was trying to set up a table and Bray Wyatt snuck up on him. Now 3 on 2, Wyatt advantage. On the outside, Tommy Dreamer goes through a table (seemed soft, as that one worries me to take damage). Bubba Ray Dudley remains against Bray Wyatt, Luke Harper, and Braun Strowman. Oh my... Bubba Ray Dudley has lighter fluid! As he tries to powerbomb Bray Wyatt and light the table, superkick from Luke Harper and then chokeslam through the table by Strowman to finish. Decent, again, goofy gimmick and Team Extreme didn't have much of a chance. [ ** 1/4 ]

Continuing a consistent theme tonight, I see... Intercontinental Champion Kevin Owens comes out first and his challenger, Dean Ambrose comes out second. Kevin Owens cuts a promo during his entrance, mocking Boston fans for thinking "we won" when their sports teams win. By the way, do you notice how WWE cameras love seeing that "Diet Owens Diet" sign in the crowd? If you dare bring any pro-Daniel Bryan or any anti-Roman Reigns signs to an event, WWE is quick to pull those from the crowd. But something that rips Owens, let's keep it and feature it! I still don't get the psychology of this match... Dean Ambrose's focus has been partnering up with Roman Reigns to feud with the League of Nations lately and yet Dean is facing a non-League opponent and randomly going after the IC Title. Match lacks heat because of this... No "sense of urgency" for Dean Ambrose to take Kevin Owens's IC Title because of the other storyline he has endured. Match was on automatic and the fans could see that until the Dirty Deeds DDT hit and a close pinfall propped them up... Eventually, Dean Ambrose reversed the pop-up powerbomb into a Frankensteiner (that's what I call it out of respect where I first saw it, Scott Steiner) and hooked the legs to get the win. Dean Ambrose celebrates the win as if the IC Title means something. [ ** 3/4 ]

Time to step up, ladies... And we finally get some tradition respected... Paige comes out first and Charlotte, the Divas Champion, comes out second. Charlotte has all of the skills to become a major superstar in the WWE... Just her rushed introduction and quick push to the Divas Title have greatly limited her. Good to see this match letting Charlotte hit some actual offense, unlike her previous matches with Paige or those awful bouts versus Nikki Bella. Confusing part of this match is that you don't know who is the heel and who is the babyface, thus negating the crowd caring. Match is becoming one-sided with Charlotte dominating... Backstage, they show Team BAD wearing whigs and laughing. OK... Paige slams Charlotte into the ring post and now goes on the offensive. Slaps the Figure 4 on Charlotte, but Charlotte reverses. Good back and forth in-ring wrestling now, but again, lack of psychology for their characters to get the crowd caring. Paige foolishly does her finisher and pin right next to the ropes near Ric Flair. Whooo... Earlier in the night, Ric was removing padding from the 2nd turnbuckle and Charlotte finishes the job, tricks Paige and causes her to land on that exposed turnbuckle. Charlotte wins... Match was solid, psychology was off... [ ** 1/4 ]

Main event was Sheamus vs. Roman Reigns in a TLC Match for the WWE Title. WWE Champion Sheamus comes out first... Good God, WWE! Match was just back and forth with both guys trying to have a dangerous match but both seemed to not be motivated to have that kind of match. Crowd was indifferent for most of the match and I was bored for much of it. Dangerous spot when both Sheamus and Reigns both well through ladders that were set up horizontally between the ring and the announcer's table. I'd expect a "this is awesome" chant, but crowd did not give it that nod... JBL adds "this is one of the most physical matches I've ever seen". LOL. Now they are trying to do ladder spots and it's the same old. These two aren't built for this kind of match. Nice spot, though, with a Superman punch on the ladder and Sheamus landed perfectly on a ladder leaning against the ropes. Now that was a nicely timed spot. As Reigns attempts to get the WWE Title, Rusev and Alberto Del Rio interfere. Of course, instead of someone like Dean Ambrose or the Usos making the save, Roman Reigns fights off BOTH Rusev and Del Rio. Ugh... Back in, Reigns tries to stop Sheamus but Sheamus hits his Kick to knock Reigns down. As Sheamus tries to grab the title, Reigns tries to muster up strength to climb the latter to further sell adversity for Reigns. Jesus Christ, WWE... How much do you need to do to protect Reigns? Obviously, coming up big in main event matches isn't doing it. Boring match with some good spots, but Sheamus and the League of Nations are only there to put Reigns over as the next John Cena. It will fail bigtime. [ **1/2 ]

And of course, Reigns enters the ring and attacks all 3 members by himself. Triple H later enters to try to calm down Roman. As HHH checks on Sheamus (don't want to see bruises when working out), Roman Reigns hits HHH with a Superman punch. Funny to see how ackward Roman is when he can't blast HHH with a headshot from a chair. Now, "Stone Cold" Roman sets up the announcer table to continue this hard sell and powerbombs HHH onto the table. That's right, it didn't break... Ooops! To ensure that the table breaks, Roman drops the elbow on HHH. SMELL THE RATINGS AND BUYRATES! Stephanie McMahon is pleading to get a doctor. Roman walks away but then runs back to hit a spear on HHH. HARD SELL... Funny how dependent Reigns is on gimmick matches and special booking circumstances instead of just naturally getting over. Feel that lump in your throat? It's not from crying but from the wrong guy getting shoved down your throat.

LAST WORD: Solid night of wrestling... Aside from the opening tag match, nothing stood out as amazing. Sadly, the WWE's creative direction is completely broken as many matches lacked any heat from the crowd because the storylines were mixed or the character's roles were confused. WWE is fully backing the Roman Reigns train now and they'll do whatever it takes to get it done. He'll win the Royal Rumble and then win the WWE Title at Wrestlemania 32. Vince will be damned if someone talks him out of that wet dream. C+ show but the WWE Creative Team deserves a much worse grade.


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