Writing a weekly column is usually a pretty straightforward deal. At some point, something happens… a news story, a rumor, a show result, and so on… and I’ll choose that as the topic I’m going to write about next.
This was not one of those straightforward weeks.
I had a topic selected, so I started to write. Then, something else came along, so I put that first column on hold to start a second one. As I’m writing the second one, something else comes along, so I have to put the second column on hold to start a new one. Just when I thought I was good to go, something else came along, which meant I needed to put yet another column on hold so that I could start a new one.
In the end, I decided I wanted to speak on all the topics I chose at some point during the week, but with them being time-sensitive, I had to put them all into the same column.
When this would happen back when I was originally writing for this site, I would bust out my “Hodgepodge” columns, where I could talk about multiple unrelated (other than being about wrestling) topics at the same time. Each subject would get its own mini-column, of sorts, all packed into one. For the first time since my return to the site, I’m doing it again. There’s a few things going on that I want to talk about, so let’s not waste any more time and get into it, starting with what my original column was going to be.
A Funny Feeling About Elimination Chamber
With Elimination Chamber just around the corner, I can’t seem to shake this sneaking suspicion that we could be seeing something wild and crazy taking place during the show. Before I get any deeper into that, here’s a look at some of the things WWE has given us on their Saudi Arabia shows over the last four years:
- The very first match on the very first show (Greatest Royal Rumble on April 27th, 2018) was John Cena vs Triple H
- A Ladder Match for the Intercontinental Title
- The Undertaker wrestling in a Casket Match
- Brock Lesnar vs Roman Reigns in a Steel Cage Match
- A 50-Man Battle Royal
- Triple H & Shawn Michaels vs The Undertaker & Kane in what was, incredibly, the first time that match had ever taken place
- Triple H vs Randy Orton
- A 51-Man Battle Royal
- The Undertaker vs Goldberg in another first-time-ever match
- Brock Lesnar vs Cain Velasquez
- Tyson Fury vs Braun Strowman
- Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair captaining teams in a 10-man tag
- “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt winning the Universal Title
- The Undertaker wrestling in a Gauntlet Match
- Roman Reigns wrestling in a Steel Cage Match
- Goldberg winning the Universal Title
- Edge vs Seth Rollins inside Hell In A Cell
- Goldberg vs Bobby Lashley
- Roman Reigns vs Brock Lesnar
- Two Elimination Chamber matches coming up
- Roman Reigns vs Goldberg coming up
- Lita’s first non-Royal Rumble match in three-and-a-half years, her first singles match in nearly ten years, and her first non-joke singles match in over 15 years
- Ronda Rousey’s first non-Royal Rumble match in almost three years
As you can see, that’s a lot of stuff. Not all of it turned out to be all-time classics, but they’re all REALLY big deals involving some major players from the past and present. How much of it is WWE trying to impress those in power in Saudi Arabia, and how much of it is those people in power making wild requests and throwing around the money necessary to make it happen? We may never know for sure, but one way or another, it keeps happening.
As I kept looking at the card for Elimination Chamber, that sneaking suspicion I mentioned earlier continued to gnaw away at the back of my brain.
These Saudi Arabia shows continue giving us things that may not make a lot of sense, but that are guaranteed to create a ton of discussion. We’ve already seen some major title changes on these shows.
Are we about to see another one?
You may have seen the story by now, but Bully Ray/Bubba Ray Dudley recently got people talking after an episode of his podcast when he said WWE should have Roman Reigns drop the Universal Title to Goldberg at Elimination Chamber, only to then have Reigns win it back on the following episode of Smackdown. As soon as he said it, people began shitting on him from all corners of Cassie Ventura’s internet. Those people said it was a stupid idea. They said it would ruin Roman’s Universal Title reign, which would come to an end at 538 days if he loses the belt at Elimination Chamber. Those folks said Bully was too obsessed with “heat” and wasn’t thinking with any sort of logic at all.
YOU may not think there’s any logic to that line of thinking, but this is WWE we’re talking about here.
Would Goldberg beating Roman Reigns to become the new Universal Champion be that big of a shock? I don’t think so. It wouldn’t be the biggest surprise in Saudi Arabia show history. Shit, you could argue that it wouldn’t even be the biggest surprise Universal Title win for Goldberg in Saudi Arabia.
This is exactly the type of thing that WWE would do. Exactly the type of thing that Vince McMahon would do. It’s exactly the type of thing Goldberg would ask for, if you’re one of those people who believes he has that type of “creative control” in his contract.
Speaking of Goldberg’s contract, it has been reported that Elimination Chamber is the final date on it. You’re kidding yourself if you think that closes the door on Goldberg wrestling for WWE again beyond this weekend, though. With as much money as WWE throws at him, and with how much they apparently feel they need him, the two sides could easily come to terms on a new deal. We might see Goldberg wrestling until 2040.
Let’s get crazy here and say that, yes, Roman Reigns drops the Universal Title to Goldberg this weekend. Then what? This is going to sound like a silly question to some, but what does that do the “legacy” of this title reign for Roman? Years from now, when you look back at it, will you remember that the reign lasted for 538 days or will you remember that it came to an end at the hands of Goldberg on a show in Saudi Arabia? Again, it might seem silly, but you know there will be people that are so upset over a title change that it’s all they’ll talk about. I know people who swear, to this day, that Bray Wyatt and the entire Fiend character was dead in the water once he lost to Goldberg, so there’s definitely history there.
The only way you could get me in that category is if Goldberg destroys Roman in something like two or three minutes. When you think of all the work that Roman Reigns has put in over the last year-and-a-half, you would think… you would hope… that his title reign would come to an end in a better manner than that.
If you’re asking me to make an actual prediction, I’d say Roman retains the title at Elimination Chamber. WWE can’t be crazy enough to pull off the title change here, can they?
Can they?!?
Like I said, I just can’t seem to shake that annoying feeling in the back of my mind.
A Texas-Sized Return For The Rattlesnake?
News is out that WWE is in contact with “Stone Cold” Steve Austin about a possible return to the ring at WrestleMania for the Hall Of Famer. My first reaction when I read the news was pretty fitting…
What?
What?!?
Austin’s last match was against The Rock at WrestleMania 19. WWE is looking to get him into the ring at WrestleMania 38. Let’s do the math here… that’s 19 years between matches.
19 YEARS.
Let’s break that down for a moment.
When Goldberg returned to the ring at Survivor Series 2016 to face Brock Lesnar, he had been away from the ring for 12-and-a-half years.
If you combine the time that Shawn Michaels missed during his first retirement and the time he missed after his second retirement until Saudi money brought him back, you have approximately 13 years.
Sting went five-and-a-half years between matches after getting injured at Night Of Champions 2015.
Edge missed nearly nine years after retiring in 2011.
After The Rock went off to Hollywood in 2004, it would be seven-and-a-half years until his next match.
There are plenty of other examples, but come on… 19 years is pure insanity. Steve Austin turned 57 the week before Christmas. That’s up there, for sure, but it’s not completely unheard of these days. Billy Gunn is 58. Sting is approaching 63. Goldberg is 55. The Undertaker is coming up on 57. However, the main difference between those guys and Steve Austin is that NONE OF THEM WENT 19 WHOLE YEARS BETWEEN MATCHES.
Adding fuel to the story are the reports that Austin had a wrestling ring set up in his home last summer. On multiple occasions over the last several years, we’ve seen instances where a returning wrestler will either have a ring put together at their residence so that they can train on a daily basis, or the wrestler will have access to a mobile ring setup that WWE offers them so that they can train in between whatever is making their current schedule busy. There’s not exactly a ton of reasons for Austin, after all this time, to have a wrestling ring put together on his property.
If you’ve been watching WWE programming, it seems pretty clear that Kevin Owens would be Austin’s opponent at Mania, should Austin agree to return. One, Owens has been using the Stunner for a while. Two, Owens has now declared war on the state of Texas and all of its citizens. Texas, of course, is the home of WrestleMania this year, so everything seems to be tying together nicely.
Are we excited about a potential return?
I’m not really worried about Austin’s physical condition. If you’ve seen him in movies, television shows, podcasts, etc. since he left the ring, you’d know that he remains in great shape. As far as his neck is concerned, WWE wouldn’t be reaching out to him in the first place if that was going to be an issue. You would also have to think that Austin, notoriously protective of his legacy, wouldn’t think about coming back if he even had a fleeting thought cross his mind that he could stink it up in the ring. That doesn’t bother me.
I just don’t understand why it needs to be a match. Austin would still get a ton of money to make an appearance at WrestleMania, without having to wrestle a match. The crowd would still lose their fucking minds when the glass shatters and when he drops Owens with a Stone Cold Stunner. It would still make for a great “WrestleMania Moment” and make highlight reels for years to come. Is WWE so concerned with Kevin Owens (or anyone else that could possibly face Austin) that they want to give him a match pay day instead of whatever he’d make for an appearance, if it’s even that big of a difference for someone in his spot?
Cody Rhodes Is Going Home
Just when you thought “Stone Cold” Steve Austin’s potential WWE return was going to be major news, it gets put on the back burner of news sites by news that Cody Rhodes has left AEW and is supposedly set to return to WWE very soon.
Whoa.
Cody Rhodes, one of the “founding fathers” of AEW, leaving the company when they appear to be building something special and heading back to WWE? The same WWE that didn’t really know what to do with Cody when he was there in the first place? That WWE?
When this news broke, social media was set ablaze with hot takes from all sorts of fans. You had the WWE dorks who were saying AEW was a sinking ship and that this was going to be the beginning of the end for the promotion, with more names jumping to WWE in the future. Then you had the AEW dorks who were saying that Cody was never that good to begin with, and that he was heading back to WWE to be Stardust and be a failure again.
Firstly, let’s talk about those “hot takes” from both sides of the fence. Is Cody Rhodes leaving AEW a sign of things to come for the promotion? I mean, I guess it could be, as none of us know what is going on backstage. However, Wrestling Business Reporter Brandon Thurston (who is the best in the business at what he does) is estimating that AEW’s revenue for 2021 was about $84 million, up from $63 million in 2020. That’s impressive growth for a promotion that is still relatively new to the scene. As far as revenue is concerned, the company certainly isn’t hurting, although it is also reported that AEW isn’t quite profitable yet, based on the amount of money that is being put into video game development. It’s a little difficult to make money on a video game that hasn’t come out yet, after all. Going beyond money, it’s hard to imagine too many top AEW names jumping, or jumping back, to WWE. You think CM Punk is having a bad time right now and is thinking about going back? Bryan Danielson? Jon Moxley? Sting? Stop it.
As far as the “Cody wasn’t good to begin with” crowd goes, a lot of you had better start scrubbing your social media of all the pro-Cody tweets and posts you’ve made over the last few years. He was one of the GODS of the AEW crowd from the very beginning. Maybe you’ve grown tired of the face act and have been wanting him to go full-blown heel in AEW, but you didn’t think Cody “sucked” until it was announced he was leaving. How convenient. Stop it.
I’m not saying this is the only thing that motivates Cody Rhodes in life, but he seems to really appreciate the money and the fame that comes with being in the wrestling business. Much more so than the other Executive Vice Presidents in AEW, at least outwardly. In that regard, a lot of these reports make sense, don’t they? At one point, Cody was one of the highest-paid performers on the AEW roster, but had recently fallen behind a lot of the new big-name signings that have come in. Cody wanted a pay raise that would have him, at the very least, match what those signings are making. That led to contract negotiations falling apart, which reportedly allowed Vince McMahon, Nick Khan, Bruce Prichard, John Laurinaitis, and Stephanie McMahon to choreograph a Tush Push line dance into Cody’s DM’s to offer him a stupid amount of money. Reports also say that Cody has basically been promised a major spot at WrestleMania this year, which has everyone speculating everything from a return that weekend to a Universal Title match against Roman Reigns, and just about everything in between.
Again, doesn’t it seem like money and fame are major driving forces in Cody’s life? WWE offering him a boatload of money and allowing him to compete on shows that have more viewers? Like it or not, that sounds like something that would really interest Cody. The added perks of a top spot, WrestleMania exposure, and things of that nature? Sweet, sweet icing on the cake.
The biggest shock of this entire story would be if Cody really agreed to return as Stardust. Cody has said, many times, that he wasn’t exactly the happiest he’s ever been while he was working under the Stardust gimmick. Money talks and all, but can you imagine if he actually jumped from AEW to WWE just to return as Stardust? My God, the hot takes may never stop if that happened. Hey, if it makes the man happy, who are we to poo-poo the idea?
Honestly, I think Cody Rhodes is a bigger deal in AEW than he could/will be in WWE. That’s not saying “WWE/AEW RULZ” or “AEW/WWE SUXORZ” or anything along those lines. I just think that Cody’s confidence came across as off the charts in AEW, with the rabid fan base and the creative control that he had in his character. It’s difficult for me to picture that same level of confidence in WWE. I’d love to be wrong, mind you, just because I feel WWE really needs the shot in the arm that a new main event guy could provide them. A “fresh” face with a lot of “fresh” matches to have with WWE’s top guys? That works for me.
Now that everyone is talking about Cody returning to WWE, watch him swerve the world and return to Ring Of Honor instead.
Oh, and no, I don’t give a single iota of a fuck about whether or not Brandi Rhodes shows up on television with Cody or not.
Weekly Power Rankings
- Carmelo Hayes vs Cameron Grimes: As always, whenever Cameron Grimes is brought up, I am legally and contractually obligated to mention the fact that he nearly broke my leg at an independent wrestling show a few years back. Even with that said, this was such a fun match. The hot streak that Carmelo Hayes is on right now is unmatched by just about anyone in wrestling. In such a short amount of time, he has shown that he might have outgrown NXT already. He’s ready to shine on Raw or Smackdown.
- The Young Bucks vs Roppongi Vice: This was far from the first time we’ve seen these two teams have a great match with each other. It was the first time we’ve seen it in AEW, though, which opened the door for new fans to witness what they can do together.
- Randy Orton vs Seth Rollins: A WrestleMania 31 flashback, but a very fun WrestleMania 31 flashback.
- Pete Dunne vs Tony D’Angelo: I don’t think D’Angelo is getting the credit he deserves for how good he is in the ring. He gets a lot of attention for his character work, which has been really good, but this is someone who has less than one year of experience as a pro wrestler. He’s doing really well for himself out there. Pete Dunne, of course, is fantastic, and should probably move on to something bigger now.
- Charlotte Flair vs Naomi: This was easily Naomi’s best match of her career. Nobody that was thinking clearly expected her to win the match, but I’ll be damned if there weren’t multiple spots where it looked like WWE would actually pull the trigger on a title change. It wouldn’t surprise me if she gets involved in the title picture again once WrestleMania has come and gone.
- Keith Lee: Making his AEW debut, he immediately came across looking like a big deal, as he should. As we’ve seen, AEW is hit-or-miss when it comes to pushing their new signings well, partly because there’s just so many people to push. It sure seems like they could have something special here with Lee, though.
- “Hangman” Adam Page vs Lance Archer: Remember what I said earlier about the hot streak that Carmelo Hayes is on? The only person who can top him right now is Adam Page. This was another banger of a match for the AEW World Champion, but I’m starting to worry for the man’s health. It seems like he ends up bleeding buckets on a weekly basis now.
- Adam Cole Looking To Be Next Up For Page: With Cole looking to be the next challenger for Page, it certainly looks like the champion’s hot streak is going to continue. It is going to be yet another situation for AEW where both people involved in a match should probably win, which makes for intriguing matches, as you truly don’t know what’s going to happen.
- Raw Women’s Gauntlet Match: A women’s match that went 44 minutes. Remember when it seemed like you’d have to combine the lengths of WWE women’s matches for several months to reach 44 minutes? It wasn’t that long ago. A great performance by Rhea Ripley lasting the entire match, but the right woman won. Bianca Belair has nearly gotten lost in the shuffle with everything else going on in the WWE women’s division recently, so she needed this boost here. Ripley is in a situation like the one I mentioned for Naomi earlier, where she can be placed right back into a prime spot after WrestleMania and everything else settles a bit.
- MSK vs The Creed Brothers: A really fun clash of styles here. The Creed Brothers, like Bron Breakker, Tony D’Angelo, and others, are improving at an incredibly rapid pace. NXT 2.0 has been a bit of a roller coaster as an overall program, but they’re building a very bright future. Julius and Brutus Creed have a world of potential, and they’re only scratching the surface of what they can do.
- Brock Lesnar’s Appearance On The Pat McAfee Show: A rare, rare, rare show appearance for Brock, but wow, what a fun one it was. Much like we’re seeing on WWE programming, this just seemed like Brock is having the time of his life. He’s entertaining, engaging, hilarious, and is showing that he probably should’ve been handling a lot more of his own promos through the years. Him destroying a table nearly made McAfee die from a laughing fit. He threw out a random “Stone Cold” Steve Austin impersonation. Just good stuff from beginning to end.
- Santana’s Promo On Chris Jericho: I’m not saying it was a shoot promo, but I am saying that it came across like one. Santana and Ortiz have been criminally underutilized since joining AEW, and I’m hoping that changes soon.
- CM Punk & Jon Moxley vs FTR: When Punk was searching for a partner here, Twitter was on fire with possible names. A reunion with Colt Cabana? Bringing in a debuting Samoa Joe? So many options. It’s not that Moxley was a disappointment, but I think people were just wanting things to go in another direction. I do like that Bryan Danielson got to cut a promo on Rampage about how Moxley’s teaming with Punk was a “one night stand” while he wanted a team with Moxley to be more of a “long-term relationship.” It’s a storyline that needs to continue on, at least for a little bit.
- Bron Breakker vs Santos Escobar: The outcome was never really in question, but it was a fun match nonetheless. Breakker now moves on to a title picture that continues to grow more and more packed. If there’s something that might require an Elimination Chamber, this would be it.
- Jay White: Yet another big debut for AEW in a long, long line of them. “Switchblade” adds another layer to the current story that is playing out with Adam Cole, Kyle O’Reilly, Bobby Fish, The Young Bucks, and so on.
- Big E & Kofi Kingston vs Los Lotharios: Another good match between these two teams. I don’t think it’ll matter in the grand scheme of things, as I don’t see Los Lotharios being pushed as much of anything, but I’ll take a good match any day.
- Fantasy Booking Solo Sikoa & The Usos vs Imperium: No, it doesn’t make a lot of sense with how NXT has presented the Solo Sikoa character, but holy shit… you put that six-man tag together at a Takeover-type event, and you’re looking at a potential Match Of The Year given the right amount of time.
- Jurassic Express vs Gunn Club: The Ass Boys continue to shine when given the opportunity to do so. You can’t ask for much more than that.
- Hook: Hook continues to shine when given the opportunity to do so. You can’t ask for much more than that. I don’t know when he’s going to advance beyond relative squash matches on Rampage, but it doesn’t seem like the live crowds care too much about that right now. They’re just excited to get what they get.
- Toxic Attraction vs Indi Hartwell & Persia Pirotta: Gigi Dolin and Jacy Jayne are really gelling together. They’re starting to win a lot of people over that originally weren’t big fans of them winning the NXT Women’s Tag Team Titles. Poor Indi Hartwell, though. She is really fading into the background with Johnny Gargano, Candice LeRae, and Austin Theory all gone from NXT, and with Dexter Lumis not being around regularly in a while.
This Week’s Playlist: “Gun Harmonizing” by Royce Da 5’9″ & Crooked I… “Something 2 Ride 2″ by Royce Da 5’9” & Phonte… “Far Away” by Royce Da 5’9″… “Beamer, Benz or Bentley (Shady Megamix)” by Slaughterhouse… “Despicable (Freestyle)” by Eminem… “MAMIII” by Becky G & KAROL G… “Diet Coke” by Pusha T… “Power Of Right” by Eddie Vedder… “Long Way” by Eddie Vedder… “The Dark” by Eddie Vedder… “Good and Evil” by Eddie Vedder… “NO SE OLVIDA” by Wisin & Yandel… “Cirice” by Ghost… “Ha” by Juvenile… “Gone Ride With Me” by Juvenile… “Ghetto Children” by Juvenile… “Follow Me Now” by Juvenile… “We On Fire” by Hot Boys… “I Need A Hot Girl” by Hot Boys & Big Tymers… “Shoot 1st” by Hot Boys & Paparue… “As Long As I’ve Got You” by The Charmels… “Give Up The Funk (Tear The Roof Off The Sucker)” by Parliament… “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi… “The Rising Sun” by CFO$… “Tainted” by Slum Village & Dwele