You folks simply can’t get rid of me. It’s me, it’s me… it’s that H-u-s-t-l-e, back with an AEW All Out Running Diary. I’m looking forward to adding All Elite Wrestling to the list of wrestling promotions I’ve done Running Diaries for, so let’s not waste any more time. You know the drill, so say it with me… LESS DEW EET!!!
(0:01) Words simply cannot express how good it feels to watch wrestling with actual honest-to-goodness fans in attendance, even if they’re socially distant. Like many of you, I trust that AEW has been taking all of the necessary precautions to let people into Daily’s Place, and from all accounts I’ve seen, they seem to be.
(0:04) First up tonight, we have Big Swole vs Britt Baker in a Tooth & Nail Match, whatever the hell that means.
(0:04) The first spot of the match is a clipboard shot at quarter-speed. That’s… not promising.
(0:05) Oh… it’s a cinematic-type deal, and we get a second weapon shot at quarter-speed. If you’re keeping track, that’s one each for Swole and Baker.
(0:06) More quicksand bullshit from Reba, waiting to spray water at Swole for multiple seconds and just standing there to get hit. I have never, in my years of watching wrestling, seen anyone that moves as slowly as Reba does. I’ve also never seen anyone that has the level of poor timing that she has. She is fucking awful.
(0:09) A super slow spot with a rolling chair pushed into someone… and it was sold. Can we get to the next match, please?
(0:10) Baker tries to literally drive a drill into Swole’s skull, and on commentary, Excalibur says it’s “borderline criminal.” Thank you.
(0:12) Swole wins. I could not give any less of a fuck. No stars. Let’s get this moving. I’m done with anything even remotely resembling a “cinematic match” from now on.
(0:13) Jurassic Express vs The Young Bucks is up next. At least we’re moving on to something that shouldn’t disappoint. Well… now that I’ve said that…
(0:16) It’s amazing that Matt and Nick Jackson have their own book coming out. I have no doubt that there will be some interesting stories in there, and I will be buying a copy, but it just seems a little early for that.
(0:17) It’s only semi-related to the match, but does anyone else find it amazing that Cody, The Bucks, and Kenny Omega haven’t been dominant at the top of the card since AEW started? That was the fear of many fans at first. As much as you might like those guys, it wouldn’t feel right if The Bucks were dominating the tag team scene, while Omega and Cody were trading the AEW World Title back-and-forth. Kudos to them for not going the easy route, even to the detriment of the overall product in the opinion of some that I’ve seen.
(0:20) Poor Jungle Boy was just on the receiving end of what seemed like a dozen suplexes.
(0:21) You don’t get free shipping on AEW merch unless you spend $150 or more? Sweet Jesus.
(0:26) Say what you will about Luchasaurus, but damn, he’s someone that is really being affected by not having full attendance for AEW shows. Live crowds absolutely love that guy. He could be a main event talent for the company, and the fans wouldn’t be bothered by that one bit.
(0:29) Very good near-fall there, with Jungle Boy looking like he was about to pick up the win before the pin was broken up. I love stuff like that.
(0:30) The Bucks get the win after hitting Jungle Boy with just about everything but the kitchen sink. Good performance by him in a loss. Good, fast-paced match that you would expect with everyone involved. I’ll give it 3 stars, but after that opener, that might as well have been 9 stars.
(0:32) Here we go… time for the 21-man Casino Battle Royale. This one is going to be a lot of fun. Fingers crossed for Brock Lesnar being the person who has the Joker card.
(0:35) Trent, Christopher Daniels, Jake Hager, The Blade, and Rey Fenix are the first group of five to start the match, with the next group of five entering after three minutes. It’s a bit of a convoluted set of rules, but I dig it. It’s something different for this type of match. Let’s not forget that, at one point, the Royal Rumble was viewed as “convoluted” compared to the usual battle royal matches wrestling was used to.
(0:39) It’s time for our next set of entrants, and we’re getting… Frankie Kazarian, Will Hobbs, Chuck Taylor, Santana, and Ortiz. Chuck Taylor is laid out by Santana and Ortiz before any of them can even get in the ring.
(0:41) I blink for a second, and it looks like multiple people have been eliminated. Will Hobbs is looking good so far.
(0:42) Next up, we have Billy Gunn, Penta El Zero M, Ricky Starks, Brian Cage, and Darby Allin entering the match. Cage starts dominating immediately, but Allin is in to go after “Team Taz” as soon as he gets there.
(0:44) The eliminations have been coming fast and furious like a wave of pent up frothy ejaculate.
(0:45) Final group time. Shawn Spears, who goes the heel route by refusing to enter the ring right away. Eddie Kingston, The Butcher, Sonny Kiss, and Lance Archer are the remainder of the final group. Now, we get to watch Archer and Cage kill people.
(0:47) Sonny Kiss eliminates Jake Hager. El oh el. Remember when Hager was supposed to be a big deal in AEW?
(0:48) Joker card was drawn by… Matt Sydal, making his AEW debut. Honestly, it was only a matter of time before we saw him in AEW… and then Sydal nearly kills himself after slipping off the top rope as soon as he gets in the ring. Womp womp womp.
(0:50) Will Hobbs is still in the match. I don’t know how, but he is.
(0:52) Ricky Starks pulls a body bag out from underneath the ring, and Cage fills the bag with thumbtacks, and then zips Allin inside the bag. Cage then powerbombs the bag out of the ring and onto the ramp. You know, I’m not a betting man, but I’d venture a guess and say that didn’t feel very good.
(0:55) Cage and Archer have a stand-off. Finally! Let’s just get 15 minutes of them hitting each other.
(0:56) Archer eliminates Hobbs and Cage at the same time, ruining all my fun. We’re down to the final four… Archer, Kingston, Butcher, and Sydal. One of these men is getting a future AEW World Title shot, and as I type that, Butcher is eliminated.
(0:57) Kingston eliminates Sydal. Thanks for coming. After a bit of nothingness for a moment, Archer wins the match, eliminating Kingston. Now… I hope and I pray that Jon Moxley wins the main event. Sign me the fuck up for a Moxley vs Archer beef for the World Title. This match was fun for what it was. It wasn’t a fantastic classic or anything, but it was entertaining, even if the expected person won. Let’s say 2.5 stars and play it safe.
(1:00) Next up is Matt Hardy vs Sammy Guevara in a Broken Rules Match… again, whatever that means. We’re starting off with Matt at TIAA Bank Field next door, waiting for Sammy. Sammy shows up driving a cart, making poor Matt and his knees and hips made of jelly run for a few seconds.
(1:03) Hardy and Guevara are atop a scissor lift, and we nearly watched Matt Hardy end his life. Sammy knocks Matt off of the lift, sending both men crashing through a table below, but the top half of Matt’s body nearly missed the table. He almost went splat on the concrete head-first. Good God.
(1:05) They’re stopping the match early. Call it work or shoot or whatever you want, but the match was called off after the scissor lift spot, as Matt looked like he was knocked loopy and he can barely stand. They’re building to it continuing, though.
(1:07) Hey, sure enough, the match is already continuing. Well, that was pretty pointless. That false ending wasn’t necessary. They could’ve just brawled.
(1:09) Sammy falls off the entrance structure, falling through the “stage” that looks suspiciously like a bunch of well-placed cardboard. Matt wins after Sammy was unable to get up before a ten count. That was stupid. That was garbage. No stars. There was barely anything to “grade” there. More time was spent wondering if Matt Hardy was just killed on live pay-per-view than in the match itself.
(1:11) Hikaru Shida vs Thunder Rosa for the AEW Women’s Title is up next. This one has the potential to steal the show. All it has to do is not completely suck and it will look great after that last bout.
(1:12) No, but seriously, what was the point of the Broken Rules stuff?
(1:17) Good intensity from both women so far in this one.
(1:21) Some unique, hard-hitting offense from both women. It’s the type of match that stands out for new viewers who may not be used to this kind of thing, especially in a women’s match.
(1:25) I love Shida’s ninja turtle wrestling boots.
(1:28) I find myself sitting and watching this closely, almost avoiding my keyboard for periods of time. It’s that entertaining so far. Definitely the Match Of The Night so far. Yes, that’s not saying a ton just yet, but the point remains.
(1:32) Shida picks up the victory. Very, very good match. I think I might be willing to go 4 stars for it. One way or another, it’s something worth going out of your way to see. I applaud both women for their efforts there.
(1:35) Kip Sabian and Penelope Ford announce that they’re going to get married live on AEW programming. Oh, joy. Sabian says that he’s going to reveal the Best Man for his wedding on Dynamite this week. AEW then takes a shot at Vince McMahon’s asinine order for WWE wrestlers to stop using things like Twitch and Cameo. That was pretty funny, actually.
(1:37) Eight-man tag action is up next. Dustin Rhodes, QT Marshall, Scorpio Sky, and Matt Cardona vs Brodie Lee, Colt Cabana, Evil Uno, and Stu Grayson. This one is personal, and it could get crazy.
(1:40) Scorpio Sky is one of the most underrated workers on the AEW roster. Just consistently good matches from the guy, whether they’re singles, tag, or whatever.
(1:41) Whatever color Matt Cardona is… I don’t think the name for it has been invented yet. He’s a lot less of… whatever color he is… this week, at least. He’s showed up on random episodes of Dynamite looking like Sebastian The Crab.
(1:44) Can we get Jon Moxley, Brian Cage, Lance Archer, and Brodie Lee in a match together? I don’t know if Tony Khan would make it happen, though. Those four men would destroy Daily’s Place, TIAA Bank Field, and at least half of Jacksonville. That’s an expensive bill for AEW to be responsible for.
(1:48) The crowd noise disappeared for large portions of the last match, and they haven’t been very loud for this one, either. It almost seems as if the stuff with Hardy and Guevara killed the heat in the building.
(1:53) “Did Anna Jay have a wardrobe malfunction, or is that wishful thinking on my part?” Jesus Christ, Jim Ross.
(1:56) I’m pretty sure Brodie Lee just decapitated Dustin Rhodes with a Lariat, followed by the headless corpse of Rhodes reanimating to get out of the way of a Colt Cabana Moonsault, getting the win for the face squad. That wasn’t anything too offensive, but it was essentially nothing more than a Dynamite match. I’ll give it 2.75 stars.
(1:58) Brodie Lee is understandably pissed off at Cabana for losing the match. Okay then.
(2:00) Dustin Rhodes gets a post-match promo, dedicating the win to Cody, and then hears he’s getting a TNT Title shot against Brodie Lee against Dynamite this week. I dig that he seemed genuinely appreciative of getting a title shot, mentioning that it’s been a long time for him. Technically, he and QT Marshall had an AEW Tag Team Title shot three months ago, but hey, whatever works. It IS his first televised singles title match of any kind since an unsuccessful attempt at winning the NWA World Title from Jeff Jarrett on an NWA-TNA pay-per-view in February 2004, though.
(2:03) Next up is the AEW Tag Team Title match, with Kenny Omega and Hangman Page defending the belts against FTR. This one is going to be good, both in match quality and the story it tells.
(2:08) Omega goes to start the match, but Page asks him if he can start instead. After Omega wonders where Page’s head is at, Page tells Kenny to trust him. Uh-oh. “Trust me” never works in pro wrestling, word to Jake Roberts and The Ultimate Warrior.
(2:13) Tony Schiavone, on commentary, mentions that AEW’s Doctor allowed the Broken Rules Match to continue because he asked Matt Hardy if he was okay, and Matt said that he was. Even in the world of kayfabe, that’s insanely stupid. That ranks right up there with Mitch Hedberg’s classic bit about asking his friend if he knows anybody who has AIDS, and when his friend says that he doesn’t, Mitch’s response is “Good, because you know me.” That’s the same level of medical skills that we’re seeing with AEW now.
(2:15) Good tag work by Omega and Page so far, but you’re almost sitting on the edge of your chair, waiting for something to happen and everything to fall apart for them.
(2:22) Beautiful assisted German Suplex by the champions.
(2:22) Even though it’s at night, I feel bad for these people having to perform outdoors in the Florida summer. You can see people sweating like crazy.
(2:26) I cringe whenever Omega hits anyone with the V-Trigger. He looks like he’s going to kill someone with it, but I guess that’s kinda the point.
(2:28) I said it before, but it’s really worth repeating… I think the stuff with Matt Hardy and Sammy Guevara really killed the crowd. You could notice them before all of that happened. Now, the building might as well be empty.
(2:30) Page has spent a lot of the last several minutes selling bumps, “accidentally” leaving Omega to wrestle this match by himself.
(2:31) Of course, as I type that, Page gets back up and is tagged back into the match.
(2:33) I probably shouldn’t be, but I’m surprised that this match has gone on for so long.
(2:37) I think we’ve crossed over from “long match” to “too long of a match” here.
(2:37) Omega accidentally hits Page with a V-Trigger. Draaaaamaaaaa.
(2:39) Two Spike Piledrivers give the win, and the AEW Tag Team Titles, to FTR. That was a really good match. It could’ve used anywhere from five to ten less minutes, but I won’t punish it too much for that. At a bare minimum, that’s a 3.5 star match, but I think 4 stars can be argued.
(2:42) After the match, Omega teases hitting Page with a folding table, but changes his mind. Page goes in, almost to embrace Omega, who steps out of the way and lets Hangman crash to the mat. Kenny then walks out in disgust. The drama continues.
(2:44) Omega leaves through the backstage area, where he meets up with The Young Bucks. Omega says it’s time for a “clean break” and climbs into a waiting vehicle, telling the Bucks that they have a decision to make. Now, we’re getting more to the story, as Matt and Nick Jackson now have to decide if they want to figuratively ride with Omega after they decided not to literally ride with him.
(2:46) Time for Mimosa Mayhem, which is one of the dumber ideas you’re going to hear, but strangely, it’s a perfect fit for the feud between Chris Jericho and Orange Cassidy.
(2:48) Shout out to Sean Ross Sapp, who is reporting that he has spoken to multiple fans in attendance for the show, and they’ve all mentioned the heat and humidity wearing on them. At this point, many of them have been sitting there for coming up on five hours. That’s a lot to deal with even if every match you’re watching is a beauty. It’s even more to deal with when you’ve had to sit and watch some of this stuff.
(2:53) LMAO @ Tony Schiavone having to add that AEW doctors DID clear Matt Hardy to resume the match, not just asking him if he could continue. Someone realized how stupid that shit sounded, saw the negative response to it on social media, and tried to cover their asses.
(2:57) I’m looking at the vats of mimosa at ringside, and it’s easy to see that it’s not actual mimosa. You think I don’t know Tang when I see it, AEW?!?
(3:01) Cassidy hits Jericho in the head with a champagne bucket, and it literally makes zero sound as it connects. It definitely hit him. It just didn’t make any noise. That was weird.
(3:04) We’re over three hours into the show, and not only are we still going with this match, but there’s still the AEW World Title match to go. This show really needed to be shorter than this. Jon Moxley and MJF might be in trouble.
(3:07) Every time someone kicks out at two in this match, I shake my head. It’s not Jericho and Cassidy’s fault. This is all just going on too long, and I don’t need to be sitting here for 45 more minutes.
(3:09) They read my mind! Back-to-back Orange Punches knock Jericho from the turnbuckles and into the Vat-O-Tang. I honestly can’t believe they’ve had Orange Cassidy defeat Chris Jericho in back-to-back matches. I’m not complaining about it, mind you. I just never thought Cassidy would be treated like a top guy. If you beat Jericho twice in a row, don’t you think you’ll be getting a title shot soon thereafter? The match itself was… a match that happened. How about 2 stars, and let’s try to wrap this show up in under a million hours?
(3:14) Main event time. Jon Moxley defending the AEW World Title against MJF. As I said, I really want Moxley to retain here, just so we can get an all-out war between Moxley and Lance Archer.
(3:20) If there was ever a show that didn’t need Moxley’s long, drawn out ring entrances, this would be it. The entrance was made longer by what appeared to be a fan running out of nowhere to hug him, high-five him, or hit him before being tackled by security.
(3:24) Yeah, I feel really bad for these two. They could give us a great match, but the overwhelming fan reaction is going to be people simply happy that it’s over.
(3:28) This is definitely a match I’m going to have to go back and watch a second time. Preferably not after sitting in my computer chair for hours.
(3:30) I’m a fan of MJF. I really am. He isn’t the type of in-ring performer that is going to do this show any favors after what we’ve been given tonight. His style of matches are fine in the midcard. They might even work at the end of a pay-per-view that is a normal length. This is bad.
(3:33) MJF is an absolute bloody mess. Not quite enough to make the Muta Scale, but buckets of blood for what we’re used to seeing in mainstream matches these days.
(3:37) Moxley starts chewing on MJF’s wound, and he comes up with blood all in his mouth and on his face. In this Covid era, Jon? Fucking gross.
(3:40) Billy Gunn is in the front row. Did you know he was still teaming with Bart in The Smoking Gunns when this show began?
(3:43) Did this match really need to go 20+ minutes, after everything we’ve dealt with tonight?
(3:45) MJF’s head looks like it’s bleeding all over again. At one point, his blood looked like it was drying up, but it’s dripping again, pouring down his face.
(3:47) After Wardlow throws MJF’s ring too far, distracting the referee, Moxley hits MJF with the Paradigm Shift to get the win. Of course, since the move was illegal for the match, this gives MJF an opening to at least get a rematch. Huzzah. The match was too long. I can’t give it any more than 2 stars. This was the worst AEW pay-per-view yet by a country mile. Two really good matches, two really bad matches, and the rest pretty much falls average at best. We go off the air at a shade under 3:50 in total air time. Yikes.
What did you all think of All Out? I’m especially looking forward to hearing from some of you hardcore AEW supporters. Am I being too harsh in my grading here? Hit me up, either below in the comments section or on Twitter (@HustleTheSavage) and tell me what you thought of tonight’s show.
I’ll be right back here on Wednesday with another Week In Review column, and be on the lookout for some extra content coming from me soon. Be good to each other, ladies and gentlemen.
